So Captain Awesome is having her surgery as we speak. They’re probably cutting into her THIS SECOND with one of those shiny scalpels which she herself has used many times in her dental adventures.
Having experience with them doesn’t make her feel better.
I think I might throw up, or pee in my pants a little. For one, I’m a million miles away, and for two, she can’t even contact me if something goes wrong because she’s under full-body-out-like-a-light ANESTHESIA!
For those of you just tuning in, my partner Captain Awesome is having a lumpectomy to remove a not-so-suspicious-but-possibly-dangerous lump in her breast.
Captain Awesome has great boobs, by the way. If you’re a boob lady, Captain Awesome is the lady for you.
Anyway, back to what I was saying — I’m worried out of my FREAKING mind. Even though it’s a very routine surgery and she’s in the brown of health. She’s a freaking PT expert.
But I’m still worried. We gay military partners have a saying: No news is bad news.
Because if something goes wrong, we’re at the bottom of the list of people the military’s gonna contact. We’re right down there with Podunk Dave who lives in New Jersey.
Come ON, people. I hope this surgery goes fast. Cause I really am about to pee myself.
But I’m trying to distract myself with the fact that today is the beginning of NaNoWriMo, or National Novel Writing Month to the uninitiated.
Although the fact that I’m blogging instead of writing my novel shows that I’m failing at distracting myself.
Confirmed Bachelor, over and out.