What you’re about to see cracked me UP. I seriously thought it was a Saturday Night Live skit when I first clicked on it.
But it’s real. It’s a video of General Amos (who was strongly opposed to repealing Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell) and the Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps sucking it up and telling Marines to get on board with repeal.
And it cracked me UP! It starts out with this awful “patriotic” music, with flags waving and everything. Then it cuts to Amos and the SMMC, who totally look like parodies of themselves. Like seriously, they don’t move anything except their mouths. And they speak in really strong versions of what I call a “military accent” — which sounds like a subset of the American Southern accent, except with the words more clipped. My favorite part is where the SMMC says, “Marines have always been professional, carryin’ on our warrior ETHOS and maintainin’ our core values. ”
This is interspersed with random pictures of Marines doing patriotic stuff like holding guns, awarding each other medals, walking into the sunset, and looking behind them ponderously while the words of the Constitution float in front of their heads, while the brass tells them to suck up the fact that they’ll be living with gays and be professional.
I literally thought this was Saturday Night Live.
Now I know I shouldn’t think this is funny. I know I should be genuinely happy that Amos has decided to get on board. I know these are top military officials and I’m supposed to respect them. But goddammit, that shit was funny. Lighten UP, U.S. military! I know you have to foster nationalism. I know you think you’re on some kind of grand video game mission. But seriously — it’s not that hard-core. The eagles are a little much, IMHO.
Sometimes I get so involved in my radical world that I forget that most Americans would think this is a totally serious, normal video to make.
Confirmed Bachelor, over and out.